Halfway

This pregnancy has simultaneously gone so fast and so slow. I have to admit now that I don’t feel sick every waking hour of the day, there is a lot of times I forget that I am even pregnant. Life is moving fast and things are hectic and the world is wild (that is an understatement, I know) and it just seems so crazy to me that we are halfway to meeting this baby. BUT, at the same time when I say that, that also means there are still 20 ish weeks until we meet this baby. All depends how you look at things doesn’t it? Regardless I cannot believe I am just over 20 weeks and having my anatomy ultrasound today! For a lot of pregnant women this is the day you have the opportunity to find out the sex of your baby. For my last two pregnancies I did not find out during the appointment as I had “reveals” planned out so we found out a few days later and I was more than ready to know. This time however, is different. We have decided to wait until the baby is born and honestly, it feels so right. This goes against everything I am as a type A planner and someone who wants full control over every single detail but, in this case this is our last baby and I think it will be so special to just wait and find out when baby arrives. No one believes me that I am fine not knowing but I really feel at peace with it and am just excited for this little babe to keep growing bigger and stronger.

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way let me chat a little bit about how I am feeling, what is going on in my brain and how this pregnancy has been so far. If you read my post when we announced we were expecting you know that we had some unpleasant hiccups in the early weeks of this pregnancy but thankfully everything else has gone relatively smoothly since then. I was majorly sick with this babe until about 14/15 weeks and am very grateful to be out of that and back to feeling (mostly) normal. I have to say this pregnancy I have felt a little more emotional and I suspect that is in large part due to everything else happening around us. I mean who would have thought we would be having a second baby during this pandemic? Not me. I have felt often overwhelmed by a lot of negative thoughts lately and truly that is just not who I am. I find it also incredibly stressful to try and not be stressed. My doctors have told me I need to reduce stress and ensure I am not working to hard etc. Well easier said than done when you are a business owner and mama of two other little humans and stress is virtually how you function. But I promise I am making an effort and am really focussing for the coming months on balancing my time. The complexity of what goes on in your mind with each pregnancy really is wild, at least for me, and I am doing my best to bring myself back into a positive mindset. If anyone has any tips I am all ears!

What’s next . . . AH, food. You might think otherwise if you follow my instagram stories closely but I really have never had huge cravings during pregnancy. In fact I find it often really hard to ever decide what I want to eat because I never really feel like anything specific. Does that make sense? Hopefully I am not alone here. I have to say this is the first pregnancy where I have missed wine so early on. I think that is in large part due to the fact we are living in a perpetual pandemic hell but I am just speculating on that LOL.

I think overall I would rate where I’m at with everything a 6.5/10 so not at a level of panic yet but not at a level of ideal calmness. I am hoping in the months to come I am able to lean into this pregnancy a little more and focus on the fact I am growing our last baby and maybe just enjoy it all a little more. I have to admit being pregnant is not something I love like I know many other woman do. I feel ungrateful even saying that and it is in no way horrible but I do find pregnancy unpleasant often. The part of all of this I enjoy the most and cannot wait for is simply welcoming this third baby. But all that being said I just want make sure I am appreciating even the parts of this I don’t necessarily love because I know I am going to look back at these days and desperately wish I could go back to them.

I don’t have much else to update y’all on right now and I’m sure I’ve bored you enough but please head over to the gram and comment your predictions on the sex of this baby on my latest post! Are we having our third baby boy to complete the team or a surprise baby girl this time around? Cannot wait to read what you peeps are predicting. Chat soon babes.

xo